Single women are constantly asking themselves “Why am I still single?” Author and dating expert (based on her own experiences) Lindsley Lowell set out to answer this question in her new book and inspire single women to have the self-esteem, courage, conviction and guts to believe that true love is still out there for them and not to settle.
In a society that tells us that women over 35 are like discounted last season’s fashions, this book is a shining beacon that shows– through the author’s own story of heartbreak and triumph and many hilarious stories–that we can, and will, endure. The book gives women the ammunition to say “Up Yours” to all the nay-sayers and skeptics who tell us that we will not find “the one.” All women DESERVE true love. No question.
Lindsley Lowell has done her time (and then some) searching for the right man and kissing a lot of frogs in the process.
“I had so many ridiculous experiences and such an enormous variety of men emailing me that I had to compile the information and believe me, it was like a second job. I did this for research. My quest for love turned into a lab experiment. I was Jane Goodall watching the chimps, and I was amazed, mystified (and at times horrified) at what these animals did. I documented it so that one day, I could tell the world and they wouldn’t call me insane. I had so much information that it filled an entire binder and I decided to put the online suitors into categories. The first and most important category -the men who met my criteria and might be possible future dates, was incredibly small and limited, like exotic birds, rare and flighty. The other categories were more like the domesticated dog – so many of them that the shelters were overflowing and most of them might not find homes. Men compared to dogs? Yeah, I know you’ve never heard THAT before.”
Her tips for finding love: 1. DO NOT SETTLE!
Don’t listen to friends and family telling you that you are too picky or that you won’t find the guy. You will. Do not listen to your mind that tells you that guy is good on paper. Only listen to your heart.
2. ARM YOURSELF
Be prepared with fun or insightful oneliners for those most annoying questions. Someone asks “Why are you still single?” Answer back “I won’t be for much longer.” or “True love takes time. If it were easy, we would all be in love.” Or “I don’t know but I’d rather be single than in a miserable relationship.”
3. LIVE NOW.
Don’t wait for a guy to buy you flowers or pamper you. Go get a massage. Buy some sexy lingerie. Don’t wait to use your nice china or buy a nice piece of furniture. Putting your life on hold will frustrate and depress you.
4. YOU’RE NOT BITTER, YOU’RE JUST TIRED.
Be careful about ranting too much to friends and family. You need to get rid of your frustration and anger. Go work out. Write down why you are happy being single right now.
5. DON’T APOLOGIZE.
Single women are taught to be embarrassed that they are looking for a man. They are called “needy” and “desperate.” It is the most natural thing in the world to want to be loved and to love. Let people know. On a date with a guy who doesn’t want a commitment–tell him to grow up!
6. BE READY FOR STUPID QUESTIONS.
Have your answers ready for questions like “Why are you still single?” or “Do you think you’re too picky?” Memorize answers so you are prepared.
7. ABOUT THE BUDDY SYSTEM:
Get rid of catty, competitive friends along with smug married friends who undermine your self-esteem.
8. MARRIED MEN WHO SEEK TO BEFRIEND YOU
Be wary of married men both in life and online.
9. TURN TO THE WORLD WIDE WEB — INTERNET DATING.
Online can work. You need to be realistic, open-minded (be picky but not nit-picky) and have a TON of patience!
Why buy it? Give it as a gift to yourself and your single girlfriends. HONEST! I actuallly KNOW Lindsley and I know that finding a good man in So. California can be a real challenge. She does put a funny spin on things yet her advice is pretty sound. You will giggle and make sure you read the entire book because there is some seriously delish dish on celebrities in this book. (If you hang around in this town long enough, you meet a celebrity –or two or more– and you find that they can be deflating.)
About the author: Lindsley Lowell is a girl about town and a former “career dater”. Her experiences of dating in a sea of mediocrity were both hilarious and tragic, she felt forced to create an anthology of these events and share them with other women. Lindsley represents many women: an educated, attractive career-driven woman who tries to walk the line between the independent modern woman and the hopeless romantic who believes in the “Knight in Shining Armor and true love”. Think of Lowell as a “romance novelist meets frontline war journalist” when it comes to reporting on life and love. Lindsley has had her own family and friends tell her she should lower her standards to find someone. If she can ignore them and still insist on true love, so can other women.
Lindsley has long served as “resident dating counselor” for her many friends – all highly effective and affected people. Her community has always admired her for her brutally honest, no-nonsense advice and approach to relationships.
Lindsley’s career as a publicist in New York and Los Angeles spans 13-plus years, but her true passion is writing. In 2011, she founded www.Ladiesinthepink - a site for women to share, inspire, create and laugh. She has contributed to Malibu Magazine and 944 Magazine.
She lives in California with her knight in shining armor and her dog Miss Winnie.
Have to say I love the book. It’s truly the voice, tone and vocal nuances translated into writing. I can HEAR her saying the words. I know her well enough to hear it in her writing. It’s not for sob sisters. It’s not for those who want to wash their hands of men. In fact, she delivers solid ideas that are worth PONDERING.
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